Who do you need permission from to do new things, big things, and to call yourself certain things in your business?
My guest in this episode is Lindsey Barr, author, speaker, and the founder of World-Changing Kids, where she empowers children to be confident leaders who will change the world. Lindsey joined me to discuss giving ourselves permission.
Many people, women in particular, feel like they need to be given permission to do things. In this episode we’re digging into what feeling like she needed permission has meant for Lindsey as an entrepreneur, and why talking about permission is so important.
Waiting for permission
This summer Lindsey realized that she was waiting for someone to tell her she was an author, waiting for someone to tell her that she could do podcasts, or for someone to tell her that she could make videos. She would look at other people's bios, where they wrote author, speaker, podcaster, and would feel sad. She knew she would love to put that in her bio, but the more she thought about it, the more she realized she could. She didn’t know who she was waiting for to give her permission!
Who is that mystery person who is going to say, “yes, you're an author?”
Owning who we are
It’s hard for many of us to own certain titles and to not have imposter syndrome come in. It’s as though we say to ourselves, “Who am I to say I am an author? I can't just say that. Who am I? Nobody else would agree!”
Except Lindsey has published a book, so she is an author! Plant a Garden of Kindness has 75 acts of kindness kids can do in their community. It's a workbook she self-published it and she has sold 550 plus copies.
Lindsey is also a speaker. She goes out into the community and does speaking engagements, assemblies, and people hire her to do this stuff.
So, where is it that people get stuck between what they're doing, what they've started to do, what they know people would want them to do, and actually owning the wording and loudly declaring that's who they are?!
When your beliefs hold us back
For Lindsey, the hesitation has to do with her background. She has a business degree, and worked in the government, and then she had kids. She stayed home and then started building World-Changing Kids. She often thought she should have a Bachelor's of Education or a child psychology degree to do what she is doing, or that she needed to actually be published by a publisher, but yet she didn't send her book to any publishers!
We often think that certain levels of education are required or that the step-by-step process of being approved happens by having a degree, a diploma, being hired into a certain job or getting promotions – but that is a belief. We were told that we had achieved something when somebody else told us. So, we start to think that needs to be how it always is.
Giving yourself permission
As an entrepreneur there's no one to “approve” of what we do. The person to best give yourself permission to do things is yourself. As a business coach, I do this with my clients all the time and my coach will do it with me. But you need to give yourself permission and you need to realize you have the power to give yourself permission to do so many things.
Lindsey does something I always recommend, she writes it all down – write down all your successes and celebrate your successes.
Write down your wins and also scream them from the rooftops sometimes, even if you fear being the centre of attention.
This podcast season is all about the mindsets, beliefs, rules, and the things that keep us from letting ourselves get to where we want to be. The more we talk about our fears and the things we want but don't know how to get, the more we realize that it's about our beliefs and we have the power to make change for ourselves. The only person who can give you permission is you.
To learn more about Lindsey and World-Changing Kids, visit: http://worldchangingkids.ca or on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/worldchangingkids
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